Already With a Gift

The atmospheric river is dying down, though they say there’ll be some kind of freeze in higher elevations tomorrow morning. It will not be a repeat of last year’s snow in April, please gods–that was the blanket of wet, heavy white that did for our roof. Which was kind of fortunate, in that we had a new set of shingles for the winter’s wild weather and the past few days’ worth of sky-river, but still.

Finding the silver lining is a habit, but one I wish I didn’t have to practice so goddamn tenaciously. Still, it’s how I cope and sometimes even how I fight. Might as well continue.

Combat today has mostly consisted of struggling out from the bed’s warm embrace. I could’ve stayed there for another eight hours without much trouble at all except getting someone else to take the dog out for loo breaks, which meant it’s just more efficient to get the hell up, I suppose. Between the push to finish two zero drafts, various other assorted work crunches, the drama over the back fence, health issues, and some Family Stuff, I feel like a couple years have been jammed into the past few days. Of course I’m still operating on pandemic time; I barely know what day it is, let alone the year.

If not for electronic minders and to-do lists, I suspect I’d be in very bad shape.

In the most recent Reading with Lili, a couple people in chat asked me if I’d read from my own works. It didn’t really occur to me to do so, but I suppose I can find some time since I’ve received a flood of “please, please do so” responses. It won’t be on Fridays, since that space is taken for other people’s books. But occasionally I might do it over on Twitch, and let the recording fall out of sight naturally since those sessions are only kept for a couple weeks or so. I’ve been kicking around the idea, and might do one of my favorite sequences from the Valentine books first–the one that made a copyeditor comment that I was playing so many games with language and structure they were afraid of making a single change.

I copied that particular aside out and kept it, because what a compliment, my gods.

I also might get the Harmony soundtrack put together again and posted. Slowly, slowly getting the music lists up and running; I should go back to burning CDs for each individual book. I’m a big fan of physical media anyway; I think I still have a stack of blank shiny discs around somewhere. Probably in that one side of my desk I never open up, because the door hits the bottom of the microphone’s clamp. And for those inquiring why I’m using Apple Music for soundtracks instead of Spotify, it’s what’s convenient for me and I cannot in good conscience go back to the latter. You do you.

I didn’t have to make my own coffee this morning, so the day’s already started out with a gift. Getting out during a break in the rain for Boxnoggin’s walkies will be another, if I can manage it. He was quite displeased with the amount of damp yesterday, and acted a damn fool when we saw a part-husky out with its owner so our ramble was cut short. But today there should be little problem and when the rain returns I can go for a run. The sidewalks will be awash but also mostly empty of other people, which is–not gonna lie–just the way I like it.

After that, more administrivia beckons, and making a few decisions. If I do want to bring Hell’s Acre out to wider publication I’ll need to start making arrangements now. I’ll probably decide while running; physical motion is best for shaking things loose and clarifying what I actually want instead of what I think I should want.

Age is also good for that. If I’d known my mid-forties would be this awesome I’d’ve hurried to get here. Still, things take the time they take, and there’s no getting around it without a higher cost than I’m usually willing to pay. So, here we are.

If I can’t go back to bed I suppose I should get started. Breakfast would be a good idea, so…off I go.

Soundtrack Monday: Chevaliers de Sangreal

It’s another Soundtrack Monday! And I have a lovely piece for you today, my friends.

I just finished the zero draft of Rook’s Rose, and this piece was quite integral to the writing of the entire serial. Hans Zimmer is pretty reliable writing music for me, and the Chevaliers de Sangreal track from the Da Vinci Code movie reliably got me into Gemma and Avery’s world each time. It’s a stirring piece, and given that I’m working with some of the same conspiracy theories and historical stuff (albeit very loosely, as usual) it hits a nice sweet spot.

I often see a smoke-and fogbound New Rome while listening to it, perhaps with the Rook and Miss Dove doing their running-across rooftops thing. It’s very cinematic, but there’s also a love theme in it as well. Avery Black knows what he wants very early on in the entire situation, while Gemma takes a while to come around. Mostly because she has her own problems to solve, as heroines do; if there’s music playing during the crossing-the-Channel scene near the end–or the end credits, which I do see in my head for some books–this is it.

Anyway, the whole soundtrack to the serial can be found here. I think it’s achieved its final fighting form since I’m done with the brute creation work of Book 2. And my brain still resembles pudding at the moment, so I’ll stop here.

Enjoy!

Soundtrack Monday: Carnival

It’s time for another Soundtrack Monday! I’m getting increasingly nervous over the release of Spring’s Arcana, which is entirely normal. Publishing is such a delayed-gratification game, one has plenty of time for one’s nerves to get frayed to transparency just…waiting.

Anyway, I was thinking about Nat Drozdova this morning. The soundtrack for the books is pretty long, as such things go–don’t worry, come release day I’ll post it so you can listen. But I thought there’s no harm in giving a little taste before then, is there?

Natalie Merchant’s beautiful, lyrical Carnival is a very Young Drozdova song. Her trip across the continent is full of wonderful, terrible, awe-inspiring things; the rhythm also echoes that of car tires on American highways. Everyone she meets has some kind of agenda, even the mortals; she herself feels so disconnected and alien she often simply watches, wondering at the show.

I’ve felt like this myself more than once. As if life is merely a pageant, and I am the scribe meant to witness before distilling. Of course, I’m no divinity…

…but there’s always tomorrow. Honestly, sometimes mortality seems a better bargain than having to bear the burden of personal history. But that’s a whole ‘nother book series.

Enjoy!

Soundtrack Monday: Delirium

Steelflower

It’s another Soundtrack Monday! I’ve told you guys about this one before, but I can’t find the exact blog post. Ah well, sometimes one is allowed to repeat oneself.

Way back when I was first writing Steelflower, I had a lot of instrumental music on the book’s playlist. A great deal of Kaia coalesced during obsessive playing (and replaying) of Euphoria’s Delirium through my headphones. (There’s a separate musical group named Delerium, too whose stuff goes on that playlist too. And yes, the playlist is still active, though I might have to dig out a couple old CDs to get some of the older tracks, I think.)

You can hear very clearly Kaia and Redfist’s hasty leaving of Hain–Kaia light on her feet, loping through city streets at dawn with a barbarian giant rumbling in her wake. You can even sense the point at which Kaia bribes a postern-guard to let her and the big red one out early, and they’re vanishing down the road into the countryside with that peculiar ground-eating stride all sellswords learn. I think Redfist has no idea the trouble he was saved by landing in the Steelflower’s capable (though occasionally light-fingered) hands that morning.

I’m thinking a lot about Kaia and her crew lately, and selecting yet more music for the series’s master playlist. But first, the zero of Hell’s Acre has to be done…

Soundtrack Monday: Chrysalis Heart

Welcome back to another Soundtrack Monday!

This week, it’s a book I haven’t posted the official playlist for–oh wait, I just did! Enjoy.

Of course Delerium is always good for a nice beat, but sometimes they hit one out of the park with the lyrics too. Whenever I needed to know what Michael would do next, I spooled up their Chrysalis Heart and there it was. Naturally he was also a fan of the Black Keys (especially this track), since he’s an obsessive weirdo, like so many romantic heroes. (Great in fiction…not so good in real life.) Jenna’s far more practical.

Even with all the diaboli, it’s a very sweet little adventure. My favorite part is the feathers, and how cagey Michael is about where they come from. I also really liked Jenna’s determination to be as good as possible under the circumstances. It was fun to work on the book, and I felt like I’d done something worthy when it was over.

I still have to write the next adventure for my good friend Dina. I’m thinking a paramedic will almost run over a very odd fellow–probably a Decurian, because they’re stodgy, which makes them fun to break apart. But a plain old legionnaire with Decurian tendencies might be nice too…

…of course, in all my copious spare time. There’s at least five more books to write before I can even think of it. I keep juggling stories, now until world’s end.

Amen.

Soundtrack Monday: Whispering

It’s another Soundtrack Monday! I spent the morning in bed reading, which was the right choice. There are a lot of libraries in my work–the magical nod to Robin McKinley’s Beauty in Rose & Thunder springs to mind, as well as The Demon’s Librarian, naturally.

The one I’m thinking of now is the self-healing one in Moon’s Knight, with its orrery that owes a great deal to Aughra’s (of Dark Crystal fame). The red sun in that book is partly Darkover, partly Dark Crystal, and partly Krypton, I think, with a heavy dose of my own tiredness during lockdown.

Moon’s Knight burned through me during the worst of that uncertainty. I needed an escape, and what better than a portal fantasy? I wasn’t even planning on publishing it; I just sent the first draft to beta readers hoping to provide them with a little relief from the crushing terror and agony. I don’t like thinking about that time, but thankfully the book itself doesn’t give me the willies. The response from the betas was a howl of “no, this book helped, what do you mean you’re not gonna publish it?”

So…I had to. And I’m glad I did, if only for the amusement of that one “reviewer” who didn’t like that the main character has a bone to pick with the god who would kill her best friend.

Ahem. But amusement aside, the full soundtrack is here, starting with Gin’s feelings at the funeral and ending with…well, you’d have to read to find out.

Of course the song that gave me the key to the prince in black was Alex Clare’s Whispering, which expresses him very well. He doesn’t show a lot of what he’s actually feeling–probably a function of his age–and his motivations aren’t the best in the world. And yet, the story is what the story is. Since I was writing only for myself, I didn’t have to coax him into being anything else. He is as he is, and so is Ginevra and the rest of that world.

Anyway, Boxnoggin needs his walkies, and since I spent a few hours later in bed the rest of today’s work will no doubt be a boondoggle. But I regret nothing. Sometimes one just has to say “fuck it” and refuse to let the piddly little fact of dawn interfere with one’s plans. It’s been a while since I wrote solely to please myself, and I think I will soonish, once I get a few other things cleared.

I’m looking forward to it.

Soundtrack Monday: Sleep

Selene

Another week, another Soundtrack Monday.

I was flicking through playlists and thought I should really rebuild the one for Selene, so I did. (You can find it here.)

Selene and Nikolai’s story was written well before the Valentine books; it makes sense, since it’s set in the aftermath of the Awakening and the Republic of Gilead’s fall. I thought about writing some parts from Nik’s point of view, but it was not his story and he tends to try to take things over–I think it’s a function of his age, since he’s learned how to survive the way a Master Nichtvren usually does, with control, coercion, strength, and terror.

Our girl Lena, however, gives short shrift to that strategy, being on the receiving end of it more than once. Her difficulty with him is only partly because he’s so goddamn controlling, it’s also that he’s essentially an alien being, having survived so long. But there were one or two songs that gave me a window into him.

One of those is the Dandy Warhols’s Sleep, which I’d play on repeat while building a few scenes he featured in. He was particularly fond of layered voices, probably because that’s what it’s like inside his head all the time. He’s constantly weighing things for likely danger, gaming out scenarios, making plans to keep “his” people safe. While Selene, naturally, goes about things in a vastly different way.

It was good I wrote this story first. I suspect I would never have found my way into Japhrimel if I hadn’t, and I also suspect the reason why he and Nik get along so well is because they’re both essentially alien predators whose love languages–if you can use the term–are perilously controlling. I’m fascinated with the question of what would really happen psychologically in a functionally immortal being, especially one with enough power to arrange most of their immediate surroundings to their liking–and the ancillary question of what it would be like to actually be in a relationship with such a being.

Also the idea of tantraiiken was in the Valentine books from the start, though Danny was very clear she was not one. I was only mildly surprised when the House of Pain showed up in Dead Man Rising, because I knew Selene and Danny had things to say to each other. Oh, and if I ever write the Hell Wars books, we’ll see the two of them in action together…

…but that’s another story.