Before They Wake
I haven’t even had any breakfast yet. But it’s so quiet here–all the kids are sleeping–that I am taking the opportunity to touch a keyboard while I can finish whole thoughts without being interrupted.
Shocking, isn’t it? I write with chaos occurring around me all the time. It’s weird to have peace and quiet.
The next chapter of Selene is up. I spent some part of the weekend scheduling further posts, and making sure they’re formatted correctly. I am kind of nervous about Wednesday, because that’s when the huge smutte scene debuts. For some reason this makes me feel…no, not unclean. Not upset. What’s the word?
Ah, yes. Trepidation is the word. I have vast amounts of difficulty writing sex scenes anyway, despite all my good advice. And every time I have to revise/edit a smexxor scene I’ve written, I end up internally cringing. It just seems so…personal.
I know, I’m an idiot. I am not violating the privacy of imaginary people, no matter how much I feel like I am. Jeez.
The weekend was nice. Everyone was out of the house, either at the beach or hanging out with friends, and I had a chance to just be alone. I am a solitary person by nature, and I find it endlessly ironic that I am apparently the linchpin of this little commune/family. The Muffin is completely gregarious–he’ll start conversations with anyone–but me, I prefer to be holed up writing. And yet I’m the one who is socializing our wild little humans. Apparently they’re well-adjusted, but I can’t help thinking that’s a fluke.
I did see plenty of unsocialized (or improperly socialized) children this weekend, though. And it wasn’t at the bookstore, for once. I did grocery shopping and popped in to Target for some Princess essentials (apparently she NEEDS a certain type of tie-dyed retro shirt), and I saw a lot of parents ignoring obviously hungry and cranky children, or being physically threatening/borderline abusive to their little ‘uns. Five out of the six really egregious offenders were too busy yapping on cell phones to notice their kids were hungry and tired and DONE with this shopping thing.
This makes no sense to me. When I take my kids somewhere, I realize that they may get overwhelmed, especially the 6-year-old. I plan it very carefully–making certain the kids have enough sleep and food in them to make it easy for them to behave well. I ALSO do not talk on my cell phone while I’m driving, and only occasionally while I’m in a public place.
Here’s the thing: my cell phone is for emergencies or for imparting necessary information. “I just found _____, do we have any at home?” “What time are you going to be there?” or, “Is this something you would need for ____?” I can’t imagine why people apparently want to yap about NOTHING in the middle of a freaking GROCERY STORE while their three-year old is obviously wet, tired, and hungry. WTF?
Granted, I have a phone phobia, so that could be part of it. But really–when I’m out in a public place with my kids, I am In Charge, I am Paying Attention, and I am Keeping Track of where my little ones are. I am not engaging in a long chew-the-fat session with Aunt Fanny on the frickin’ phone. I am too busy paying attention to where my kids are, what they’re doing, and what I need to get at this store so I can go home.
What ices the cake is these people speaking ever so LOUDLY. I do not want to hear their conversations. I could care less about who is sleeping with who, what rap song you adore, how the trailer’s doing, or what the state of your thong is. (Lest you think I’m being tongue-in-cheek, these were actual subjects. I kid you not.)
The other thing, the thing that makes me so angry I can’t even see straight, is “parents” (do they deserve the name?) yanking around or shaking their kids in public. WTF? These are little people, goddammit. Would you treat another adult that way? No, because another adult would either kick your ass or call the police. Why is it okay to physically abuse your kids in public?
Maybe I’m oversensitive. I have never found it necessary to spank either of my children. I rarely even have to raise my voice. (Before you ask, yes, there are consequences for their actions. It’s not that I don’t punish. It’s that I don’t beat. I was on the receiving end of that enough as a child to remember what it’s like.) And my children are NOT little demons. They say please and thank you. They walk and do not run in public. They do not scream or stage fits in stores.
When I see someone picking on a kid literally a fourth their size, it shocks and saddens me, and makes me furious. You do not bring your four-year-old to the store without a proper snack or nap, yap on your cell phone endlessly while looking at CDs, and then shake or slap your four-year-old when she starts to cry because she’s overstimulated, bored, being ignored, and hungry. You just don’t. You spawned it, you’re supposed to be an adult and TAKE CARE OF IT now, and part of taking care of little human beings means sometimes you can’t stand around yapping on your frickin’ phone. Grow UP.
*sigh*
I really didn’t mean for this to devolve into a rant. But I am so proud of, and happy to have, my little ones. I can’t imagine treating them the way I saw several “parents” treating their kids this weekend. It just breaks my heart.
On a funny note about cell phones: I was in my regular Thai restaurant this weekend, and had occasion to observe a trio one table over eating with their BlackBerries out on the table. All three would stop their conversation with the people they were with the instant the cell phones buzzed or tinkled.
Can you imagine? These people were ignoring their lunchmates to BlackBerry, for Chrissake. When I go out to eat with someone, it’s because I want to have a conversation with them, not get interrupted by someone who isn’t even physically present. I can’t imagine, say, the Selkie putting her phone on the table and giving a higher primacy to its boops and whistles than to our conversation. I just can’t. Now, I can see her checking in with her Boy Scout about when she’s going to be home, but it’s obvious when we’re at the table that our primary focus is our conversation.
Oh yeah, and the food. I doubt any of the BlackBerry Trio even tasted their phad Thai. Which is, in my humble opinion, a damn shame.
So. It’s Monday and soon the house will start to stir. I’d better get breakfast in me. I can hear someone moving in the hall. It’s a little person.
I’m going to go hug whoever it is.
Over and out.
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August 25th, 2008 at 9:05 pm
What makes me additionally upset about that, is there are so many of us that CAN’T have little people and would jump at the chance of dealing with the trials of every day life with them.
August 26th, 2008 at 6:29 am
In my opinion the start of world peace would be when certain people start to act like parents. As you do, as my mom did, and you do, more kids would be happy, more people would be happy. More happy people = less violence = world peace.
By the way, my mom raised us about the same way you’re rainsing yours. We were never hit, or jerked, when we were with mom or grandma for that matter we were with them, they listened to us, (lol course this was back in dino’s age no cell phones, etc). But if we were tired or hungry, etc., and we weren’t quite done with what we were doing it was, can you be good/hang on, etc for a little longer we’re almost done. And you know something within a short time we were done.
As for punishments, yeah, but no hitting or slapping. Our biggy was mom saying …..or else. as in behave or else. LOL to this day (I’m 45) I have no idea what that or else is/was, just the threat was enough.
August 26th, 2008 at 12:10 pm
Thank you so much for Selene!!!! Fell in love with her in the other books so excited! Will buy the book of course because I buy all my books & keep them. Glad I don’t have to wait for the publication. Liked Night Shift, but loved Dante & Japhrimel.