Monday Morning AV Roundup!
Because I’m functioning with an accumulated sleep debt the size of the national deficit, voila! I bring you the best of last night’s sifting through YouTube in search of bad 80s music videos to show the Sullen One. I found…well, more than I bargained for. Who knew bad music videos were so hard to find, and that they would lead one down the primrose path?
The Sullen One said, “Cows with guns? You HAVE to click that.”
Which led, of course, to the Matrix Cow fight scene…
And which made me think of George Harrison.
Which of course led me to Sledgehammer. Coolest video around in the 80s, maybe because it starts out with a health-class human-reproduction thing.
Who could think of Peter Gabriel and the 80s without thinking of Say Anything? Oh, Lloyd Dobler, I will always love you with a love purer than penguin love.
Which led me to BAD 80s. Oh, Murray Head. How could you? But seriously, this annoyed me because apparently nobody’s thought to put the sequence from Bloodsport (at least, I think it was Bloodsport) that has Jean-Claude Van Damme running around the city to this song on YouTube. Come on, guys. I’m counting on you.
Which led me to Safety Dance, the 80s music video that did more for the SCA than anything else. Hey, don’t get me wrong. I LOVE the SCA. I especially love how SCA boys call me “Milady.” I have visions of Kiefer Sutherland all done up in Three Musketeers drag whenever I hear it.
Yes, I’m that sick and twisted. I’ve had a huge Sutherland fetish ever since Lost Boys.
What discussion of the 80s music video is complete without Karma Chameleon?
Oh, the pain, the pain. Get the antidote, STAT! Aha! The Selkie reminded me yesterday of the Cure’s Lullaby. Hurry!
Ahh, that’s better. But what’s this? Oh no. NO. Please. I love this song. Don’t do this to me…it’s too late. It’s John Waite’s Missing You.
It was, of course, the song meant for Brokeback Mountain.
Oh, and speaking of Lost Boys?
Oh, God. I am such a geek. Okay, so it isn’t 80s but it might as well have been. The hair. The fake Plains Indian jewelry. The Bon Jovi.
Incidentally, before I wrote X-Men fanfic I had about a two-year preteen period where I wrote Young Guns and Young Riders slash. No, nobody will ever read it because I burned every last scrap of it. When I started writing X-Men fanfic. *hangs head in shame* I never really counted that as “real” writing.
Okay. Two more hideous things from the early-90s-might-as-well-have-been-80s I’ll inflict on you, then I’m gone.
Oh, Mr. Big. Worst, sappiest lyrics EVAH. You can make my life worthwhile, I can make you start to…smile…. Approached only in sheer teenage “won’t you sleep with me” by THIS video.
I used to have such a crush on Nuno Bettencourt. He just had such wonderful hair. And in the 80s and early 90s, that was All That Counted.
Happy Monday, Readers.
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